Nurse Loves Farmer


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Monday, 06 February 2012 14:23

Keeping in Mind the Great Blessings...

When my daughter was about 7 months old, I decided I wanted to start trying for a second baby.  Although having children less than 2 years apart would (I'm sure) be much more work than having them closer to 3 years apart, I have theorized that children who are closer in age tend to be closer friends to each other.

My daughter is currently almost 14 months old, and I am still not pregnant.  I am back on fertility drugs (I had to go on fertility medication to have Celia also), and it has been almost 5 months (it took only until the second month to become pregnant with Celia). 

I am struggling with the possibility that my body may not be able to conceive another child.  I have PCOS, so it was possible I would not be able to get pregnant the first time.  I am also coming to terms with the possibility that it is not in God's plan for me to have another child - and I am constantly praying that His Will is what determines my life, and not mine. 

I was just 24 years old when I decided to start actively trying to have a child.  Knowing it could take awhile, I wanted to know for sure if I wasn't able to have children naturally so that I could look into the process of adoption early.  I probably would have pegged myself as too young except that I expected it would take me up to 5 years, and I hoped to have most of my children before I turned 35 - whether I had them naturally or adopted them. 

I remember dreaming about having a child when I was a teenager, and although I always said I wanted more than 2 or 3 children, the only child I ever visualized was one little girl.  She had blonde, curly hair, and big eyes. 

The December before I turned 26, our little Celia was born.

Whether or not I am able to have or adopt any more children - I try to remember to thank God daily that he allowed me to have my one beautiful, big-eyed baby girl.


Read 2002 times Last modified on Wednesday, 22 February 2012 22:11

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